Moving on…

I want to forget the way you would touch my skin. And how with a single kiss, I felt like I was on heroin.

I want to forget the intensity of your gaze.
How you would undress me with a single stare. No one will be able to match the way you would make me feel, But you also brought me pain and it’s time for me to heal.

I’ll never forget your strength while holding me in bed.
Your protective arms while making me feel great.I’ll never be able to love the same way I loved you.
Sadly you don’t feel the same and now you’ve found someone new.

Now it’s not me at your side waking up at dawn.
And no matter how much it hurts its time for me to move on.

Lost my self…

ever feel like quiting is the easier option like whats the point in trying so hard and knowing your going to fail I’ve pushed myself to keep it together as i don’t wanna disappoint the people i love but they don’t understand how i feel and they don’t see the person i have became and the person i was before, i feel like i’m living a second life one where i appear happy and altogether and the other i’m the person who will stay in all day cus i’m too afraid to go out there and meet new people and do things but the truth is i’m neither of these people i’m fake and sometimes i feel like do people really see me or do they only see the person they think they know but how can they know me when i don’t even know myself anymore i don’t wanna give up or quit on things but every time i try i give up before giving it a chance. The truth is i’ve lost myself a long time ago…

Sometimes it happens

sometimes I feel alone then I look at the sky and I feel my loneliness has gone. Sometimes my heartbeats faster than normal condition. sometimes situation arrives different than what I have decided. Sometimes my mind goes blank and thinks about nonsense things. Sometimes I walked through a road which has a dead end. Sometimes I cry a lot which never have a end.

Alone or not its your choice..

Suddenly it feels not many people know what it’s like to be alone because they believe it is a bad thing. Learning to be alone is one of the biggest life experiences you could have. You build character, become independent, confident and you get to know yourself more then you would with someone. It’s no joke that we learn to be alone because we haven’t found that one person to come into our lives to carry us but if you do find someone, do you completely forget about being independent?. No the answer is no. We shouldn’t rely on others, happiness comes from you

Look into my eyes…

And I ask of you do not look at my outside and judge my past on my mistakes. Look into my eyes. Search deep and you will find the pain hidden within. I do not show it to the world. But please understand me when I say
A smile is not always as real as the pain beneath the surface.

Please get to know me. Please understand me before you sentence me in your eyes……..

Deep in my heart</3

You never know when, why and you will get your heart sunk in the oblivion. It just happens with in your body where by the brain partially receives little massages.

It starts like whenever you see her, touch her, the heart pumps at an irregular pace, you lips feel open and close. You feel like you are not anywhere.

And when speaks, the ears are fully connected to heart and the brain. Within your body, there falls the passage where her massage flows like spirits down to the unknown. You can’t ignore anything from her mouth, you value her whole life more than anything.

Whenever you feel this……..she is

DEEP IN YOUR HEART

Morning thoughts

I woke up thinking so negatively this morning, but I channeled my thoughts and changed my attitude before it took over my day. I ended up having a pretty good day. It’s all about mindset. you can wake up on the wrong side of the bed but it’s your choice how you continue your day. you can’t always control events throughout the day but you can control how you react and how you respond. keep a cool head and don’t let the little things determine your whole life. feel what you feel but just because you feel a certain way doesn’t mean you should make things worse by reacting negatively. if you’re mad, pissed off, sad or any feeling that puts you in a bad mood, do something to brighten up your spirit instead of things that keep you feeling low. I know it can be difficult, believe me, I know. but it’s not impossible.

I was never…

I was never a disappointment to anyone 
I always wanted to please others 
until I got sick of it 
I became a stranger to everyone
I was never heart broken 
I was never in love
am I missing something? 
or did I pass by my love
is it important to fall in love..
to be heart broken 
to justify feeling
lonely 
sad
empty ?
NEVER SAY that I don’t understand 
because I was never in love
I will always understand 
because I can feel too

wanting…

I want to listen to some quiet music and stare into nothingness. I want to put the clock off and cuddle for hours. I want to fit in your cuddle perfectly and just cry a little. Cry for what has been, cry for how I feel today, cry for the fear for tomorrow. I want you to wipe my tears and say that it is going to be okay. I want you to hold me in that position for hours. Be quiet but repeat the same thing. Dim the lights and and hush my loud crying. Help me to cry quietly. Because I want to get this out of my being. And I fear that it will not get out of me without crying heavily. Please just me. in that perfect position. for now and forever

Psycho

A short story. Written by: Me

She never liked to share. As a little kid, she made sure no one touched her toys or ribbons and if she saw anyone with them she’d throw a tantrum. It continued like that till she matured and pursued bigger things, what was hers was hers, no one else’s.
The day she met her, she knew she wanted her for keeps. There was just something about her, it didn’t help that she was dark, tall and devilishly beautiful, witty with a sense of humor. Girls like that were hard to come by , she fell hard for her.
To her, she was just a friend, one she liked to spend time with sometimes, but to her, she was more. She never saw her as anything more, but she knew it wasn’t enough for her, while she lived life oblivious of her infatuation with her, she had already marked her as hers.
Maybe if she had known, things wouldn’t have turned out so bad. She saw her in an eatery holding a girl’s hand, looking at that girl the way she should have looked at her and she almost lost her mind. She sat in her car and stalked them for an hour. Then she followed them to wherever they were going.
She picked the lock, she had learned to do that in boarding school and now it came in handy. She walked into the house, and the thought of what they would be doing sickened her.
They were in the throes of passion so none of them saw her coming. First she knocked the girl out,then she faced her with a knife she had picked from the kitchen. “You’re mine,” she said. Then proceeded to inflict multiple stab wounds on her body, lost in her rage she couldn’t hear her pleas, it was until her eyes turned all white and her blood splashed her on her face, that she realized what she’d done.